Children are not computers:

Your children/teenagers need to realise, you, their parents have a role in training them to control their emotions, think for themselves, and know how to make sensible and practical choices.

Programming your child’s mind

1. A computer programmer has to enter the correct information and data into a system. One mistake and the programme will not work and be worthless.
2. Parents are the first and best influence to prepare their children/teenagers to manage their lives safely. This is essential when they are alone or away from home.
3. Parents already have information and knowledge about life from their experience and the evidence of what works.
4. Children/teenagers prefer open and honest discussions with their parents. They need real facts on which to develop their abilities to control their emotions, etc. in order to make cautious choices and take thoughtful actions.
5. Parents need to use what they know, and seek additional ideas, skills and information to equip and arm their children/teenagers to avoid unpleasant consequences.
6. Life cannot be programmed like a computer. Circumstances happen without warning.
7. The blue-print which children/teenagers need to discover and follow is knowing how to recognise, identify and analyse uncontrolled and unpredictable emotions, irrational thoughts and faulty beliefs. If this step is ignored wrong choices and unwanted actions may cause unwanted consequences.
8. A computer programmer has to attain proven facts or data before starting with an assignment.
9. Parents need to coach their children/teenagers with the correct ideas, skills, information and data before a challenge arises.
10. When a virus gets into the computer system who knows what damage this may cause? Like computer viruses and hackers, peer pressure works undetected in the life of your children/teenagers.

Examples of human viruses:

Everyday, your children/teengers’ emotions, thoughts, and beliefs will be questionably affected by other people especially friends, circumstances and the environment. Let us not forget the media, technological equipment and the entertainment industry.
Parents can no longer have expectations and assumptions that other people or the school systems will prepare and provide emotional support for their children/teenagers.
Parents need to be on the alert that “emotional-viruses” are not being installed in their children/teenagers’ minds, thoughts and reasoning.
– Would you know if something untoward had been programmed into their vulnerable minds?
– What are they watching and hearing from others?
– What happens when children/teenagers “go-off-line”?
– If wrong information is programmed into a computer who is most likely to detect the incorrect results?
– Yes, a virus catcher may pick up viruses before too much damage is caused.

What “virus-catcher” can you install in your children/teenagers minds to pick up their unwanted emotional viruses, wrong information, deception and dishonesty which may have been filed into their minds and thoughts?
Even “good” children/teenagers may become influenced by mean “programmers”. Unfortunately, it is easy to miss seeing what is happening in the lives of your children/teenagers.

Know what is happening in their lives:

– Children/teenagers are unlikely to know what is acceptable or unacceptable behaviour unless they are informed.
– They have not had much experience of life to know the difference.
– They don’t learn from threats and nagging.
– They learn from observation, experience and information from you, the environment and others.
– Would you want others to play mind-games with your children/teenagers?
– Their behaviour reflects what has been programmed into their minds.
– How would you know if your children/teenagers have landed on what I call the “shaky emotional-platform”?

The easiest way to detect an emotional-virus is to watch their behaviour and listen to the words they speak.

Questionable emotions become questionable thoughts, actions or behaviours:
– They are not computers, and will not automatically do what they are told to do.
– They have to be encouraged and assisted every day, until they know how best to respond to challenges and negative messages from other sources.

By harnessing unwanted emotions, your children/teenagers are more able to become self-confident. They will learn to live and find healthy freedom and independence. They will have a better understanding how to gain a good self-image and relate positively to others. You, the parents, will then be able to become more relaxed.
Computers have no emotions. The lives of people revolve around their emotions both good and questionable. Therefore, it is vital that the children/teenagers are not negatively “programmed” or influenced by others, through their vulnerable emotions, thoughts and beliefs.
SheiIa writes articles for her FaceBook page, “Step into Your Future”, as well as her LinkedIn page, “Sheila du Plessis”.
Her book is going to be released later this year. The book provides answers to questions about how to deal with uncontrolled emotions, irrational thoughts, and unsound beliefs. It assists parents to equip their children/teenagers to manage their lives efficiently.
For more info, please contact Sheila at: sheiladup@telkomsa.net